A successful marriage requires trust. Unfortunately, previous negative experiences can create mistrust in solid relationships. If your spouse has experienced past hurt, feelings of uncertainty can be difficult to overcome—particularly if an emotional situation opens old wounds. Try not to take unearned distrust personally. An open heart and consistent willingness to understand will demonstrate you’re trustworthy. To build trust, ensure your words and actions match.
Imagine being married to someone who speaks an unfamiliar language and doesn’t understand yours. Excellent communication would require learning each other’s language. Similarly, our understanding of how to give and receive love grows as we see love communicated through certain words and actions. We may not recognize love communicated in unfamiliar ways. Learning your spouse’s love language can help you connect in ways you never dreamed possible.
When we share life with another imperfect human, sometimes we slide into habits of nitpicking, finding fault, or complaining. Ephesians 5:20 encourages us to give thanks for everything. While the verse isn’t about marriage, the principle applies. When minor irritations create contention, try appreciating every positive action your spouse takes—from clearing the table to capping the toothpaste. The results might surprise you.
Taking responsibility for our actions isn’t easy, particularly if we feel our motives have been misjudged or we’re not the only one in the wrong. But a willingness to ask forgiveness for our mistakes—or for outright bad behavior—can create an atmosphere of open communication in marriage. Admit shortcomings instead of making accusations. This strategy can foster peace and may encourage your spouse to reciprocate.
Too much screen time might be hurting your marriage. This week, take the Cherish Challenge: Give up funny cat videos to spend time talking with your spouse. Encourage your spouse as enthusiastically as you cheer for sports. And instead of allowing distractions, eliminate some screen time and spend intentional moments cherishing your spouse. You’ll improve your marriage, and that social media influencer—or your favorite team—won’t even notice you’re gone.
Remember that first date with your spouse? The excitement. The nerves. The planning. You’d love to experience the thrill again, but you’re both just. So. Tired. Simple gestures and a little creativity can help bring back that first date feeling. Hold hands in public. Build a pillow fort in the living room. Make popcorn and pull out a board game. Kiss until the kids complain. Have a backyard picnic.
Above all, keep loving one another earnestly,
since love covers a multitude of sins. ~ 1 Peter 4:8
Trusted Marriage Resources
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